Unplugging: 18 Months Later

In July of 2010, I wrote a blog post entitled "Unplugging and Taking Control." Little did I know that that post would become one of the most popular ever written for this blog. To date it has generated the second most number of hits and has consistently been one of the most read pieces on this site. Today, I was trying to think of something to write and I realized that it might be time to revisit the "Unplugged" concept and put it into perspective for the current times.18 months may not seem like that much time in general, but in the world of DeMolay, it's almost half of a "generation" of the average active membership, hence why it bears revisiting.

I think the one thing we sorely lack is a solid definition of the Unplugged idea. In my thoughts, I see it as follows:

"Unplugging means transferring control and responsibility for Chapter programming and planning to the young men while keeping their skills, abilities, and needs in perspective. It further mandates that Advisors recognize their role as mentors, guides, and protectors rather than hands on project managers and doers."

That definition was fairly long and complicated, so let's break it down. First, the real key to the whole statement is summed up in "transferring control and responsibility for Chapter programming and planning to the young men." This means that the members of the Chapter should be deciding what activities the Chapter is going to do and how they are going to plan them. It purposefully uses the word responsibility - as the DeMolays need to take personal responsibility for their program. If an event doesn't happen or a program fails, it's on the young men and the leadership of the Chapter to recognize their short comings and learn how to avoid those problems in the future. That's the real value of the DeMolay program. With little exception, there is not one thing in DeMolay that can't afford to fail. Failure is part of life and DeMolay provides a safe area for members to fail and learn from their mistakes. There really is no other program like it.

Next, we come to "while keeping their skills, abilities, and needs in perspective." This is the other half of the phrase above. It assumes that the Advisory Council understands the maturity and ability of the members of the Chapter and adjusts its approach accordingly. No, twelve year olds are not capable of planning a 300 person banquet. However, they are capable of learning from the process of planning. This might be a case where an adult has to step in and provide more "hand on" expertise, but effort should be made to include the young men in the planning and execution of the event to the fullest extent possible. This way, the next time the Chapter does a banquet, the Advisors will need to do less. Unplugging is a process - not just a flipping of switch. Advisory Councils should facilitate this process over several terms. In doing so, they will create an older generation of DeMolays that can teach and transfer skills to younger members. The first step, however, is creating that older generation, which usually has to be done with some Advisor assistance.

Now, we come upon the mandate that "Advisors recognize their role as mentors, guides, and protectors." By this I mean that Advisors must come to grips that they are there to be a sounding board and a resource, not a fall back plan. The young men should be able to ask the Advisors for help and receive guidance and support. They should not be able to ignore a project with the knowledge that at the last minute an Advisor will sweep in and clean up the pieces to ensure the event occurs. The definition also reminds the Advisory Council that they are to protect our youth and their assets through the Youth Protection Program and sound financial decisions in planning for the future.

Lastly, it enjoins the Advisors not to be "hands on project managers and doers." Again, this must keep in mind the skills and abilities that have been previously mentioned. Early in the process of Unplugging, Advisors may have to take a more active role. The important part here is that an Advisor should never plan, organize, or execute a project without the direct involvement of a member. Period. If you, as an Advisor, are putting together an event based upon the whims of the Master Councilor or because the young men won't step up to do it, you aren't Unplugging - you're enabling. In the long run, enabling members to not do the work and still succeed will have far more disastrous consequences than one or two failed programs.

There are a multitude of facets to this concept and even more "what-ifs." The best thing to remember is that as long as you have the active participation of DeMolays in the operations of a Chapter, you are Unplugging. It won't happen overnight and it isn't going to be a quick process, but it will provide for a better Chapter and a better future for your local program.

Frat! ~ "Dad" Seth Anthony

Hey, unplug the jar, would ya?

Westmoreland Chapter, located in Greensburg, PA, has quickly become one of the greatest adopters of the Take Control! and Unplug concepts. The interesting part of their story is that they were initially one of the more skeptical groups out there. I fielded many questions from Westmoreland on just want it meant to "Unplug." They were working with a younger generation of DeMolays (mostly under 15) and weren't quite sure that it was time to cut the proverbial apron strings just yet.

"Dad" Bruce Neubauer and I talked at length about the idea and how best to apply it in his Chapter. Slowly, but surely, the Advisory Council started taking less and less of a role in the stated meetings, but more of a role before and after them. In this way, they were able to help the guys work up their agendas and prepare for what they were going to talk about. They found that the young men were able to run efficient meetings, with less chatter, that lasted shorter than they had in the past. After the meetings the Advisors would debrief the guys on what worked and what didn't, followed by how they could improve in the future. A little constructive criticism goes a long way!

The last part of this equation was finding a way for the Advisors to become more conscious of how they were behaving in the stated meetings. They took an old concept, the money jar, and applied it to this situation. Each time an Advisor speaks at a stated meeting, without being called upon by the Master Councilor, they  have to put $1 in the jar. By the looks of the jar, there isn't much talking going on during the meetings anymore! This is a fabulous way to become more aware of what you are doing within the stated meetings. Most of the time you don't even think about how you could be effecting the situation.

Thanks to the Unplug jar the Advisors of Westmoreland are becoming more conscious of how they help their guys. This in turn has produced visible changes in how their Chapter is run, all for the positive. So, how have you been "Unplugging?" Tell us about it at webmaster@pademolay.org!

Frat!~"Dad" Seth Anthony

More Adults Unplugging

Recently, I told you about the Advisors of Westmoreland Chapter and their "Unplugged Jar." Today, I have an article from the recent Pilgrim Chapter Newsletter written by "Mom" Jan Harms, Chapter Advisor. Have a read!

Normally I like to have the articles in our newsletter submitted by the members of Pilgrim Chapter. However, recently I have read several articles and blog entries regarding the concept of adults going “unplugged” and letting their members do all the work. I feel the need to share that this is the reason I became motivated to step up to the plate and serve Pilgrim Chapter as Chapter Advisor. After being active in other youth groups, and seeing that the adults do all the work in those groups, this unplugged concept is exactly why I wanted to be involved with DeMolay.

 Pilgrim Chapter is YOUR Chapter. It is about what you want and how you want it. It is your decisions that will drive what activities we do and don’t do, what things we pay for and don’t pay for, and how we grow—or don’t grow. This is YOUR Chapter. You have to make it what you want.
The last meeting, we had 7 members. Each one of them had an opportunity to make a decision on fun activities, whether they wanted to participate in service activities, or even attend the meeting. We need you there to experience that! We need you there to make the decisions that need to happen. We need you to bring in the prospects and applications to grow.

 This Chapter Advisor is unplugged and guaranteeing you that she will work that way with each and everyone of you—but YOU need to be ready to be plugged into Pilgrim Chapter to move us forward! I hope to see you soon!

Wow! "Mom" Harms certainly gets the "Unplugged" idea! So, what is your Chapter doing to Take Control!? And, if you're an advisor, what are you doing to unplug?
 
Frat!~"Dad" Seth Anthony

Have you unplugged?

I must admit, this is the third different blog post I have started today. That doesn't mean that I've written three - hardly! It means that I've attempted to write a post three different times, but the first two just didn't strike a chord with me. I had a bit of the old writers block. Then, as if by magic, the following appeared in my inbox.

From: "Dad" Bruce Neubauer
To: "Dad" Seth Anthony
Re: Unplugged

As you know I had read the blog on "Unplugged." We, the Advisors at Westmoreland Chapter, have been backing off for quite a while. We have seen some improvement over the last few months with the young men and we have taken a bold step moving forward. At our Advisory Council meeting last night we put in a new policy for the Advisors . We have a big jar with an unplugged power cord in it - it is out unplugged jar. Every time an advisor talks at the meeting, without having been put on the agenda in advance, or having been called on by the Master Councilor, they must put a dollar in the jar. We have told the young men that we are there to help in any way we can, but the Chapter belongs to them and they need to know what they want to do at the meeting, in advance, and follow through. Last night there were only 2 times an Advisor had to remind them that they needed to act on am important issue, but the members saw the advisor put the money in the jar and after the meeting they were advised about a couple other things they forgot during the meeting. This will make them think about what they must do.

As I stated before, when you have a chapter of newer members the Advisory Council must give them the tools to conduct business and run the chapter. Once you notice that they possess the tools, then it is time to bring out the unplugged jar.

Wowzers! It makes me feel really good to hear about Adivsors who read the blog and then act on some of the information they read in a new and positive way! Thanks "Dad" Neubauer for sharing!

So, what is your Chapter doing to Take Control! and Unplug?

Frat!~"Dad" Seth Anthony

Unplugging and Taking Control

With another Convention down, a new group of young men have taken over the leadership of PA DeMolay, guided by Tom Moyer, our new State Master Councilor. I've had the pleasure of working with Tom over the last year or so, and we've talked a lot about membership. We took some time to talk about his goals as SMC, and how he wanted to impact our membership number. After some discussion with Tom and his other officers, the "Take Control!" theme was born.

Notice - I didn't say the Take Control! Membership Campaign, or Take Control! Community Service Initiative. I said the Take Control! theme. There is a very specific reason for that. This program isn't just about getting new members, or being involved in your community. It's about getting back to the most basic foundations of the DeMolay program. A program for young men, operated by young men.

It has become very easy to let Advisors run the DeMolay program. They don't take over out of some malevolent desire. In fact, it's quite the opposite. They end up in charge because of how much they love the program, and don't want to see it fail. Rather than letting the young men learn to plan and execute, and in some cases fail in the process, they assume the reins and begin to make phone calls, send letters, and do other tasks which should really devolve to the Master Councilor and his officers.

DeMolay provides a safe environment where it's okay to fail. Did you hear that? Let me say it again. It's okay to fail. It's often been said that you learn more from failing than from success. Are the young men in your Chapter really learning anything by letting the Advisors do the work? Of course not! Let them try to plan a paintball outing. If they succeed, the rewards are built in, thanks to the activity. If they fail, so is the punishment, in that they don't get to go have a good time with their friends. If this kind of event fails to happen, it's not the end of the world, as long as you debrief the event with them and help them understand how it could have been more successful. Let the guys take a leap of faith, and see what they can do.

So, while our young men are Taking Control! what are the Advisors supposed to do? The answer is simple; unplug. That's right, unplug. Cut the power. Let go. Take off the safety wheels, and let the young men run the program they are supposed to run. This isn't to say that the advisors don't have a role in youth protection and risk management. That is still their primary concern, but rather think about each event and determine if its success or failure really will impact the overall Chapter program in the long run.

Knowing WHEN to let a failure occur is the difficult thing. Failing to hold an Educational Day observance may seem like a small thing now, but when the Master Councilor goes to apply for his PMC-MSA, it becomes a much bigger deal. What is an Advisor to do? Explain to the Master Councilor what he's missing from his program. If he fails to plan the event, then it's up to him to explain why the event didn't happen. If he was really going for his MSA this could be a big blow, but learning to follow the rules and the boundaries of the program is an important life skill that shouldn't be short changed. The question is, will this individual failure have a serious negative impact on the Chapter as a whole? There is no right or wrong answer to this question-- it is situational and the decision is often based on the Chapter's current strength.

Sometimes an Advisory Council cannot just unplug. For example, financial transparency should be the norm in every Chapter. The young men should know exactly how much money they have at any one time, and the Advisory Council should be performing self checks on the financial statements each month. Remember the line from "DAD" training - "their money, our stewardship." Unplugging doesn't mean Advisors aren't involved. Instead, in this case, they are more like a financial watch dog. The young men should meet with them to discuss their financial needs and goals, and come up with a plan to make it reality. Again, notice who is coming up with the plan; not the Advisory Council, but the young men.

Unplugging isn't easy, but this is a theme for Advisors that PA DeMolay is going to use all year, in conjunction with the young men who Take Control!. If you are an active DeMolay, ask yourself, "What am I doing to take control, and show my Advisors that I am ready and able to be in charge of my Chapter's future?" If you are an Advisor I encourage you to ask yourself "How can I unplug, and let the young men become the drivers of our Chapter's success while still maintain a safe environment?" Now those are some tough questions, but the answers will pay dividends that cannot be counted in dollars and cents.

Frat! ~ "Dad" Seth Anthony